American Idol

This blog is dedicated to Simon, Paula and Randy...

I don't like your show.

It was cute and flashy once. Now its just fuckin annoying.

If the other "idols" were that good, then how come they are not real "idols". I mean if they were Idols shouldn't they be on the news all the time. When was the last time I heard about clay aiken? he was made of such a huge deal because he was just as talented as the "black guy", wuz his name?...Where is he now?

You want me to believe on your show. Here is what I propose: Have Mariachi, Opera and Jazz night. Mariachi because it is hard to sing in a different language, sound convincing by attitude, voice and message while a barrage of trumpets assault you from behind to make the point of the song. I want to see Paula judging that!

Opera? Hey, why not. The contestants are frickin american idols. which will mean that in order to succeed they need to be challenged and overcome that challenge. I think Puccini would do it.

...oh yeah and no wuzzy "modernizing arrangements" no...sing it in italian and with passion.

and of course Jazz. this one is simple. Jazz is the original american artform. american artform, american idol. Not to mention that it is difficult and it would challenge the poor bastards that try to find quick fame through a process of self discovery bombarded by constant assaults to their skill, integrity and self esteem. Yes. Jazz would be the ultimate test.

and Ryan Seacrest? Can someone just throw a rock at this bastard! You want to make this show a hit? Bring Steve Harvey, Bring Adam Sandler bring people that truly love music and will be honest. I would love to see madonna there, hosting and tear another a-hole to an anorexic looking chick that can sing. I would love to see Bob Dylan throwing a shoe at some guy that butchered his song.

...and how come none of the contestants have never done hip hop like Tribe called quest or The roots?

I smell conspiracy!

Caring Men Are Happier Than Traditional 'Macho' Men

Caring Men Are Happier Than Traditional 'Macho' Men, Study Suggests

ScienceDaily (Apr. 30, 2008)

My props to profesor Miguel Arciniega for getting to the root of this. Finally there is empirical evidence of something that women can point out to their men whenever they come up with some trogloditic expression. Caballeros 0r gentlemen are more caring and happy. Machistas are just a step away from having a fricking heart attack or being stabbed by their wives in their sleep.

The thing is that every man, gay or straight has some "machismo" in him. Its genetic. Add testosterone and the fact that we are missing one rib and it gets worst. I like research, but I also think that research that is not applied into action is just caca.

So, to help my homy Miguel I've come up with a few applications on how to use the Macho-Caballero scale.

For marketing cars

Caballeros (1 to 4) drive VW Beetles and Mazda Miatas

Machos (6 to 10) drive Hummers with a large phalic symbol in the hood and shinny rims and trim. man like shinny. They like rubbing the knob of the shifter.

For eating

Caballeros watch their diet, exercise and keep it balance

Machos will eat corn pops cereal with a beer and get the surprise toy first.

For sports

Caballeros will occasionally watch and discuss a game.

Machos do not know the months of the year, but are guided by the seasons of sports.

For dating

Caballeros engage women on conversation that is stimulating

Machos will go through a variety of short and long term meaningless relationships only to find out some time that they are alone and be terrified or will meet Pedro, the latino papi that will make them be in touch with their "real" manhood.

For music

Caballeros: will listen to women musicians

Machos: will masturbate to the covers of the cd's those women musicians.

y volver...volver...vooooolver! return, return...return!

Hello there my amigos and haters.

I'm back. Not that I had gone anywhere. No...I wasn't deported, nor taken in one of those nifty ICE raids...no way. I was simply going through some life changing stuff. Tu sabes, bringing another child to the world and being responsible. However, it has been too long and I was itching. So here is my perspectiva...

...and its all about Obama!

That's right...el prieto...el negro...senator Barrack Obama.

If you are still trying to figure out who are you going to vote for. Let me make it easy for you...

vota por Obama....vote for Obama.

John McCain and Hillary Clinton are two exceptional candidates who are smart and dedicated. Yet mi panita (my bro!) Obama, has one thing that the others seem to lack. substance. Don't get me wrong so does John McCain, but the difference between the two goes down to one thing: embracing a spirit of renewal, of freshness. Its like having a warm and a cold coke. McCain is the warm coke...when thirsty you will drink it. Its still good, its still a coke but it is not as refreshing and satisfying as an ice cold Obama coke in the middle of a heat wave of mediocrity brought to us by G.W. Bush aka el pendejo.

This is your chance to make history. Nothing can go wrong, everything already did. And if you doubt his leadership...we've been without a leader for almost 8 years. We've had a "decider".

Besides I can't wait to find out on the inagural ball who will be invited to play.

WuTang Clan? Dr. Dre? Earth Wind and Fire?